Keep The Home Fires Burning

“No one loses anyone, because no one owns anyone.  That is the true experience of freedom:
having the most important thing in the world without owning it.”
–  Paulo Coelho, Eleven Minutes

Some would say the first six months of a relationship are the best.  We laugh a lot, we do things on a whim, we “fall in love” and then WHAM.  Things change.

Suddenly the relationship gets real.  Partners discover their need to return to self where they rekindle time for personal interest.

So how does one keep the fires burning when the relationship turns real?

Keep the fires burning

How does one keep the fires burning when a relationship turns real?

Ernest Hemingway said “the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving too much, and forgetting that you are special too”.  To keep the home fires burning it is important to understand that everyone cultivates stability in different ways.  The extrovert is nourished through social interaction while the introvert develops through reading and quiet time. Both denote personal needs, but in opposite directions.  Embracing diversity is crucial to creating a balanced relationship.  Defining what is special to you and what is special for your partner feeds both the individual and the couple.  Relationships are about support for each other.  Don’t try to control. Tune in to what is special for yourself and your partner.  Work to meet each other’s needs while remaining true to you. Continue reading  

How Do I Know I Am In A Spiritual Relationship

Spiritual relationship is far more precious than physical. 

Physical relationship divorced from spiritual is body without soul.

–  Mahatma Gandhi

Spirituality can be as multi-faceted as the human personality. So can relationships.

Grab a piece of paper and let’s go back in history.  Describe/draw your version of a purely physical relationship.  While it may have included great sex, it probably did not last.  Now recall relationships where growth, respect and truth were stifled.  Describe/draw your lesson from these relationships.  List your desires for a new relationship as opposed to one lost in the past.   How will you know if the next one is spiritual?

Spiritual Relationship

How do I Know I’m in a Spiritual Relationship?

Spiritual relationships allow people to grow in his or her own way and in their own time.  While one person may be farther along in their journey, both are willing to assist the other in positive ways.  Each person offers nourishment, as well as understanding.  We all know growth can be painful at times.  Continue reading